2030 (dog)

2029 (rooster)

2028 (monkey)

2027 (sheep)

2026 (horse)

2025 (snake) 

2024 (dragon)

2023 (year of the yin water rabbit)

Jan. 2

: Create paintings adjacent and as part of my choreographic research processes

2022 (tiger)

 

Dec. 25

: Graba Todo 

: Santa Claus is Dead 

2021 (ox)

2020 (rat)

2019 (pig)

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July 27 (Keith) 
: what if there is nothing wrong with my audience?

: #1 - there is nothing wrong with x. | #2 -  i don't have the power to change you | #3 -  give the best that you've got. 

: spend (5-10) minutes with another person in the room and you can't use language. then place an object between the both of you and play. 
 

July 25 (Jean Abreu) 

: what do i give myself permission to do or not to do within the context of performance?

: i am a channel for the divine and an embodied accumulation of all those who have come before

: calling for support within the constellation of the group without using the voice and using the voice 

: create a sonic image

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July 23 (Jean Abreu) 

: asking the person who has passed specific questions, sometimes the person talks back to you

: follow the pulse and allow the form to emerge as it wants without leading to any specific place or focus in the room

: the emotional quality is vibrating through the VOWELS, allowing the emotions to emerge whilst containing them

:  what is needed to merge the grief with joyous buoyancy? 

: the plasticity of grief into resilience, oral traditions of laments, the landscape determines the language being used (metaphorical or literal) for the respective lament

: professional lamenters connect the story of the deceased with their own personal narratives of loss that essentially connects past-present-future

: the mourning of losing a son from a mother's perspective

: estaremos conectadxs para siempre

aunque no naci en esa tierra

tu cuerpx y el entornx de mi cuerpx

se unen en una tercera identidad

tus huesos son mis huesos

tu sangre tambien corre por mi

nunca te olvidare porque me cambiastes para siempre

pero ahorra despues de tanto tiempo

estoy agradecidx

pronto llegare

printo llegare

al lado de tu mar

pronto llegare

un encuentro abre puertas inesperadas y por eso mi corazon se abre

cada dia mas

cada dia un poquto mas

: grief care squad 

: Breaking Dishes by Rihanna 

: who gets to express anger?

: the topography or sonar-scape of the emotional states 

: queerness, gender, hierarchy of desire and trauma, power, lightness, acceptability of pain, counterpoint, listening, requesting, destroying, caring for, illuminate, 

: the sound that gets swallowed that exists in the other room - (score)

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July 23 (Jean Abreu & Frederic Gies) 

: the pleasure and pain of slightly falling apart

: i am still senior to my body even as i practice surrendering and giving into the loss of control

: continue to dig into this place between light grief and unambitious stripper dialogue 

: when the group breaks apart, what happens?

: we are constantly in a state of perpetual falling, and building structures of resilience as we free-fall, how are we falling and towards what dimension? grief offers a structure of support, objectifying the grief

: the wall of broken dreams, Okwui's grief book in Ralph's work, Irish & Greek rituals for helping the dead along their transitional journey (research)

: two becoming three - explore this choreographically (triangulation of the pelvic floor and third eye) and interpersonally 

: authoring our own lamentations and taking that into a physicality 

: the voice activating the organs like a light feather 

: from Britta workshop - drawing the cycle into reality as a sigil, only a cycle that has closed

: noticing - time - dissolving

: lightning - vortex - portal

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July 21 

: PURGE

: don't build a house inside of your suffering, build infrastructure that will allow you to bloom unapologetically

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July 20 (Isabel Lewis)

: a metaphor, or quality of un-ambitiousness 

: risking being seen, sculpting the gaze, being and being seen 

: inherent power relations between audience and performer, self and others, paying client and stripper who is willing to be consumed for a price

: a dance between subjectivity and objectivity, a cyclical transfer of power and desire 

: the pleasure and disgust and wavelength of being objectified, the multiple layering 

: competition, coercion, conflict, do i enter the world as a subject and ascend to greatness or create an alternative world rooted in deep femininity? 

: erotic sociability, permeating the erotic as a socially-engaged praxis

: spirited bodies, and bodied spirits 

: arriving at a certain kind of coordination between two or more or various subject hoods/objective entities without forgetting one's subject hood - mutual pleasure and empowerment, consent and reciprocity

: parasitic vs. symbiosis - how do we do this dance of relating? sameness as atrophy

: read the text "Why Love Hurts"

: a constant opacity that didn't allow me to fully localize or make / project meaning onto the body of my partner so that everything was in a process of becoming - a re-patterning of how we are meant to socially engage...an emptying that temporarily suspended socialization 

: re-learning desire - anyone in this room can be my partner 

: when, if at all, did you feel the most vulnerable?

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July 16 (La Pocha Nostra)

: what risks will it take to continue re-patterning and be able to run through the imaginary dark wall that the body-mind constructs? the fear is partially constructed and partially systemic. how long am i able to sit in the discomfort?

: imagining myself getting lathered up, full body, in coconut oil and then getting slapped hard on my ass over and over again. being bound and holding the bound position as a way of releasing what has been stored in the layers of my flesh through and beyond the interstitial generations. what are the trigger points that allow me to soften into the space? that encourage my ego to integrate? that is willing to let the heart open through a practice of gratitude and witnessing; that thank you for your presence and for being here with me, inside of this temporary community that we have co-created 

: can i continue being with in order to gauge what my body needs?

: which image is the core anchor through which all else would fall apart or untether if it wasn't present?

: tableaux vivante sculptural garden (w/ and without partners) 

: eye gazing / star gazing with artistic framing and search for potential sites

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July 14

: (3) people mirror massage for (12) mins

: eyes closed fluid membrane research w/out leading or locating  with arms  for (30) mins [can be done naked]

: eyes closed to begin as you find the vibration of the electronic music, allowing the form to emerge through the vibration for (45) mins. what does it mean to dance together? attempting to generate a vibrational landscape [can be done naked]

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July 13

: the eternal disgust

: theatre without any actors or playwrights

: the algorithm becomes the performer, algorithmic theatre

: the possibility of dying on stage

: every system of symbolic logic contains irrationality at the heart of it

: the crisis of representation

: detaching data from its context, cognitive detox

: how am I or am I not participating in my own commodification?
 

July 12

: score for the eyes
: non-spectacular physicality

: going to dance clubs and seeing what wants to happen as part of technosomatics

: doing the same dance 100x, each time will be different, how do we perceive variation? loops / fruit loops

: make one stupid dance phrase, playback your play, transformation of one box of Humana clothes

: six hour improvisation distilled into a ten minute condensation

: what is relevant for you now from the past? what gets commodified and what doesn't?

: the living archive, the iconic, forms that form and un-form themselves

: the liver, the eye, the knee, the transfer

: What does it take to cross borders?

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July 3

​

: bringing something outside inside, as a method-ritual

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: why does it take an extreme moment for us to wake up?

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: chtulucene by Donna Harraway and processes of re-worlding - a new epoch where refugees from environmental disasters will come together, a time when humans will try to live in balance and harmony with nature (or what's left of it) in mixed assemblages. if there are tentacles, there are tentacles of connection, as the remaining humans realize that living with nature and being a part of the ecosystem is important for our survival.

​

: how can grief rituals assist or lead us through these processes of re-worlding?

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: collective grief rituals in the United States --- what would that look like?

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: create a grief ritual to share with others. can be filmed or be created beforehand or performed live. can also be participatory. 5 minutes max. (examples: eulogizing, witnessing)

 

June 27

​

: what is the performance that you haven't wanted to make that needs to be made?

• what would it actually look like to show my rage about the U.S./Mexico Border situation and about my family's deportation?

• the femme that was stamped out of me 

• sexual violence testimony
   

: metaphor and reality of the burger from dough to finish 

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: choosing not to do anything about it is an active non-neutral choice

: constellations frameworks that inject humor into a tense situation 

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: subverting expectations of what my body should do or how it should move. a singular image drawn out until the very end, a commitment to the action whilst leaving space for spontaneity. and the timing and the pause, a reverent decomposition and rite of passage 

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: where is my joy located?

2018 (dog)

2017 (rooster)

2016 (monkey)

2015 (sheep)

2014 (horse)

2013 (snake)

2012 (dragon)

2011 (rabbit)

2010 (tiger)

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